A love/hate relationship with the Nintendo Wii

Once upon a time there were two friends named Megan and Heather. They were taking a drive down a lonely highway when they saw a sign that read, "4 trampoline sale". They were intrigued by the misspelling and decided to call the number listed and were delighted to find out that the sale was for an almost new, big trampoline and it was a steal at only $25. They dragged Heather's mom, Joy, to go check it out with them and were thrilled beyond belief when they saw what an excellent condition it was in. The girls started loading the trampoline in Megan's car only to discover that the biggest moron in the world really wanted $125 for it. The girls were devastated (and slightly pissed off) because the only thing they wanted in life was to have an awesome trampoline to play on...they had already planned all the cool activities they could do on it. Driving home, the girls contemplated running their car off the bridge into the lake because they thought life would never hold any meaning for them again until...they discovered that the Nintendo Wii was only $199. What a bargain!!! They bought it, rented Mario Kart and Resident Evil (which sucked...thanks to the idiot Movie Gallery guy Adam), and picked up pizza so they wouldn't be bothered with having to cook for the boys, and raced home to play with their new toy. After a frustrating hour of realizing that they had absolutely no coordination and would never win any of the racing games, the girls started to get the hang of it and played tennis and baseball all night long. The End

Dumb race simulator at Advance Auto Parts
Michael and Eric

Eric tries the simulator

Michael watches Heather box

Artie comes searching for food

Michael gets it all set up for us

Heather

Michael plays Mario Kart

Yay, I love video games

Plunging to my death on Mario Kart

Yay, only 12th place

Heather races and loses

Michael loses interest and watches YouTube all night

Heather and Eric

Lazy Saturday

This week I had the privilege of experiencing what the 9th circle of hell would be like and it came in the form of a 2 ½ hour bus drive with cheerleaders and band members. Lincoln had our first (and final) round of playoffs Friday night and of course it had to be a million miles away in Bibb County. It was freezing, way too long of a trip, and filled with a bunch of teenage drama (my favorite kind), the only redeeming factor was that we lost and, thankfully, football season is OVER. HURRAY!!!! I am so exhausted, but we are in the home stretch and we only have 24 days of school until Christmas break. YAY!!! Saturday we tried our hardest to get motivated and do something, but laziness won and we decided to stay in, make sushi and Chinese food, and watch the Alabama game and some movies. I feel like a grandma being so exhausted on the weekends, but it was one of the best days we have had in a long time. Shawn and Michael went road biking while Heather and I went to Wal-Mart and got groceries for dinner. We made a delicious dinner (our best attempt at Chinese and sushi yet) and a scrumptious chocolate cake and watched Bama show LSU who’s number 1. Then we watched Joy Ride and Boondock Saints and texted everyone we know with stupid pictures and forwards…if that’s not exciting then I don’t know what is.

Elementary girls performing at the pep rally
The LHS Mascot

Pee Wee Cheerleaders

Chloe, Daisy, Molly, and Emily

Nina

Artie loves lazy Saturdays

He has a hard life

Little Molly

Driving back from our shopping excursion

Drive home to Pell City after a long day

Weekly dinner at Chili's

Heather at Chili's

Michael loves Chili's

Michael and I dress Artie and Nina up in their new headpieces...chicken and pharoah...they love their lives

We found these awesome costumes for 75% off at Target... I love after holiday sales.

Michael and Shawn get ready to go road biking

Artie

Vegetable stir fry

Heather right before she spills rice all over the floor...we love making the biggest possible mess when we cook

How nice

Our sushi

Heather rolls some California rolls

Plain fried rice...we have to make everything separate because everyone is picky :)

More vegetables

Almost ready for dinner...only two hours later

Heather

Eric scavenges for food, we love to make people starve before serving them

Heather has a serious conversation

Shawn

Nina hides in the window

Michael and Eric play Fourza 3 all night

Shawn and his congratulations on your new job cake...

that is also a 2nd birthday cake for me...because we always need an excuse to make dessert.

Shawn and I with our cake

School Spirit, Beth's Visit from Houston, A Fabulous Halloween Bash, and My 26th Birthday

October flew by so quickly that it was over before we even realized it. The last weekend in the best month of the year was absolutely fabulous!!! Heather and I had planned to have a Halloween party and it was made even better because of the four day weekend we got due to the Talladega races. Thursday was extremely hectic for various reasons. At school, the cheerleaders decided to put on a pee wee cheer camp for all girls K through 5 as a fundraiser for our trip to the Alabama game. We had an overwhelming response and all the girls are super excited. After school we had the final regularly scheduled football game of the season against Clay County (undefeated since the 1960's). Of course I beat Heather down until she agreed to come on the hour and a half long bus ride with me...what are friends for if not forcing each other to suffer together? The game started out boring as usual, but by the fourth quarter the crowd was on its feet (me included...I know...what a shock) with breath baited as we waited to see if Lincoln could beat the reigning champions. During the last four minutes Clay County scored once and Lincoln scored twice bringing the score to 28/26. HAHA...Suck it Clay County!!! Now we just have the playoffs to look forward to (or, in my case, dread with a passion). After the game Heather and I went scavenging at the thrift stores with Michael and Eric to find the last minute touches for the boys costumes. Friday was the busiest day known to man. Heather and I woke up early (okay at 11) to meet Michael for lunch and then we had to search all over Alabama for red chile pods for the enchilada sauce. We raced back to Pell City to get the groceries for our Mexican fiesta and our Halloween party and then forced Eric to take us to collect firewood in his truck. We planned to have a huge bonfire for our party and we wanted it to be so bright that it shut off the street lights. The rain almost put a damper on our plans, but due to the Boy Scout genius also known as Michael our pyro plans were not thwarted. Then we raced to the Birmingham airport to pick up Beth and thank goodness her flight was delayed or else she would have been waiting all alone like Little Orphan Annie. I was so glad she was able to make the trip from Houston to come hang out for my birthday and it had been way too long since we had seen each other (almost two years). Back in PC we met up with Shawn, Rex, and Michael where we made dinner and helped Eric with his Mr. T costume. Heather and I made a Mexican buffet that was so spicy poor Shawn and Rex had to sit on the balcony while we cooked because the chile fumes were too much for them to handle. It took us two hours to get everything done and poor Beth had to eat a cold chicken burrito while she waited, but everything was delicious. We made enchiladas, chicken and steak flautas (for the carnivores), chile rellenos, queso, rice, beans, and ice cream tacos for dessert. I absolutely love to cook, but I loathe cleaning up afterwards especially when I am such a genius and decide to blend chile pods without the lid on the blender. Fabulous!!! Six loads of dishes later we were able to sit down, relax, and...oh wait...we forgot Eric's mohawk. We had to force Shawn to be our head model while we fashioned a black mohawk out of sewn-together batting that had been spray painted. We are such crafty geniuses...while I worked on making the mohawk the correct height Heather made the most disgustingly perfect gold tipped feather earrings to complete the costume. After that, Shawn and I thought it would be a great idea to stay up until 5:30 in the morning because who needs sleep right? Saturday I was so exhausted...I have got to learn to silence my phone when I want to sleep in because it never fails that my phone will ring at the crack of dawn and of course once I'm up I can never go back to sleep. I took Beth on a quick tour of Lincoln so she could see where I work and then Heather, Michael, and Eric came over to eat leftovers for lunch. We then had to figure out a costume for Beth (she originally wanted to be the School House Rock Bill, but couldn't fit the costume on the airplane) and she came up with the best idea ever...Octomom. We found the most disgusting baby dolls at Dollar Tree and a perfect wig at Walmart and her costume was complete. We went home to shower because nobody likes stinky pigs and then raced to Heather's to get dressed and help her with the food for the party. Heather and Michael did a fabulous job decorating for our Halloween party...everything looked totally awesome, the food was delicious, and the bonfire was perfect. All of our closest friends showed up and looked fabulous in their costumes. Zach and Kanina arrived as a Bubba and Ugly Betty, Shawn was Larry Langford, Rex was afro man who ended up looking like Latoya Jackson as the night progressed and his wig fell, Eric was Mr. T, Cassie was a Mafia Mamma, Claire, was a fairy, Michael was Walker, Texas Ranger, Heather was Raggedy Ann, and I was a bar wench. I haven't dressed up for Halloween since college and it was really fun to go all out for my birthday. We had a great time hanging out, seeing the trick or treaters (some of whom didn't even have the decency to dress up, yet still expected candy), having a dance party, having a karaoke contest (well at least Heather and I did and we learned that if we ever want to clear our a room we should sing because the only person who didn't scatter in the wind was Kanina who I think stayed only to take pictures and document our stupidity), sitting around the bonfire (where I thought it would be a good idea to sacrifice Beth's...I mean Nadia's eight children into the fire), and just enjoying good company. It was the best birthday ever despite the fact that I am no longer in my mid twenties (sob) and I am so glad that I got to spend the day with my closest friends. Sunday the three of us took Beth to lunch at P.F. Changs and on a quick tour of Birmingham before we had to take her to the airport. We took her to Samford University (a possible law school for her if Morgan does his residency at UAB), Five Points, and the Vulcan. It was really fun although super rushed because we can never get it together early and it took us forever to get out of Pell City. After that we came back to PC, picked up pizza and movies, and relaxed at Heathers. We watched The Orphan which was incredibly creepy (I hate children) and Imagine That. A fabulous weekend all around. Thank you so much Heather and Michael for putting on the best Halloween party ever and thanks to everyone else for coming out and sharing it with us and making my birthday totally awesome :)

A Wig Fashion Show

Sometimes our lives are so boring that we have to invent ways to pass the time. Monday night Heather and I drove into Trussville to pick up Heather’s car from the Chevy dealership. Her car’s computer had malfunctioned and, sporadically, the engine would just die, leaving her stranded and increasing her chances of getting plowed over by a semi. We were hungry and wanted to eat dinner at Logan’s, but Michael wasn’t going to be ready for about an hour. Instead of driving all the way back to Pell City we decided to check out the local Halloween Spirit Shop and spent two, hilarious hours trying on every wig they had in the store. It was so disgusting, and the employees just loved us!!! I can’t wait for Halloween and am even more appreciative of the fact that I am not bald because wigs are sooooo nasty.

The mullet twins
"I pity the foo"

Wednesday (disgusting) Addams

Heather as "Seduction"

Mrs. Brady

Heather, the 50's Flapper

DISGUSTING!!!

Grandma Megan (I sure won't age well if this is my future!)

Look Al, it's Peg Bundy

Farrah Fawcett

I love my 10 inch Mohawk...it feels so SLC PUNK

Heather as Farrah

Farrah and the Punker

Megan/Joe Dirt

Megan the Viking (I can't believe I put this on my face...hopefully I won't get rabies)

Mullet Michael

GAAAYYY

Mr. T

Michael with a two-toned Mohawk

Michael's 10 inch 'do

I'm afrotastic!

He ain't nothing, but a hound dog

The worst one yet

Michael sports the teen heartthrob

Heather wears the shiniest wig ever and I try on the 80's rocker

He's Back!!!

It's Marie Antoinette and a disgusting blonde idiot

Heather tries the poof and I wear the Bride of Frankenstein

Michael/Michelle

The happy couple

We are awesome/disgusting and probably will have to shave our heads once we get lice and ringworm

Lucy and a blonde mess

I try the John Lennon 'do

Rastafarian Heather

"Jamaica, we have a bobsled team... I see pride, I see power, I see a bad ass mother who won't take no crap off of no one!!!"

Heather Lennon

We definitely gave the customers something to smile about...and the workers a long night of reshelving the nasty hair pieces.

At the pumpkin patch

Our weekend plans to celebrate the beginnings of fall were almost foiled by the arrival of a big bastard aka Bruce’s son, but luckily we were able to squeeze a lot of fun into a small amount of time. Thursday we had our last home game of the season at Lincoln and it was a really good game. The boys won 47 to 0 and this win put us into the playoffs. I am glad for the team, but personally want to throw myself off a bridge because this just means more cheerleading drama. GREAT!!! Saturday we went to the Baker’s Farm Pumpkin Patch with Heather, Michael, and Shawn. We had a really great time! We got to play in a really “scary” corn maze, climb a hay pile teeming with children, see Indians dance, take a hay ride, pick our pumpkins, pick cotton, and enjoy kettle corn and roasted corn. After the pumpkin patch, we stayed in and relaxed with Heather, Michael, and Eric. We ordered Chinese food and watched a bunch of movies: White Men Can’t Jump, Hocus Pocus, and Just Add Water. We love being lazy on the weekends. Sunday we continued decorating Heather’s house for our Halloween party next weekend and spent some time with her mom so she wouldn’t be lonely. We are starting to get really excited for next weekend and we have a lot to look forward to. Beth is coming Friday and we are going to make a Mexican Fiesta for all of our friends, then Saturday we are going to have a really awesome party/bonfire, and Sunday we are going to take Beth on a tour of Birmingham (hopefully impressing her so much that she will force Morgan to do his residency at UAB…fingers crossed). I love fall!!!

The pumpkin patch
A pumpkin patch scarecrow

Michael at the corn maze

Shoving corn in Shawn's jacket

Heather and I love everything about fall

Heather and Michael

Michael, Shawn, and I in the corn maze

Michael uprooted a corn stalk

Heather rips up the corn

An Indian dance

Heather relaxes by the tent

Trying to play King of the Mountain, but the stupid kids wouldn't move :(

Heather jumps off the hay

Michael and I pick cotton

We love being cotton pickers

My pathetic amount of cotton

Heather and Shawn with their cotton

Heather and I

The four of us in the cotton field

My new boyfriend...Jealous???

Some animals in the petting zoo

Two horses

having a blast and smelling manure...my two favorite things to do

Michael loves farm smells

a poor lonely donkey with no friends

Shawn makes a new friend

Michael

Shawn

Lookng at the ant hill of childen and being thankful that I am not a mother

I love the farm animals

Heather and Micahel on the hay bale

Shawn and Michael

Heather and I

Michael and Shawn share an intimate moment in the outhouse

Who needs privacy anyway? :)

Shawn and Michael

Heather and I in the gross, disgusting outhouse...we would never survive in pioneer times

Wandering around in the pumpkin patch

Me in the pumpkin patch

The pumpkin patch

I find the perfect pumpkin, but have to get it before this dumb kid steals it.

Michael, Shawn, and I

Heather in the patch

Shawn finds a disgusting, moldy pumpkin

Michael finds the great pumpkin

Michael, Shawn, and I with our pumpkins

Heather and I with our pumpkins

All the pumpkin patchers

Me

Our three pumpkins

The hay ride

Heather and I on the hay ride

Me with my pumpkin

Our tractor ride

The fall scenery

Heather and I by the hay bale pumpkin

Heather and Michael

Michael and Shawn

Paws in the Park

This weekend was one of the best weekends we have had in a long time. Friday was the Homecoming game at Lincoln and we finally won after quite a long losing streak. Heather went with me and we had a really good time cheering and yelling at the cheerleaders through these mini megaphones that we ordered for the school. It was soooo cold and it made me realize that I am never going to make it through the winter with my El Paso wardrobe; I need some warm clothes, or at least some clothes that I can layer. After the game we were forced to drive home with the STINKY mascot costume, it was so bad we almost died and had to keep the windows down since we forgot to bring our gas masks. Then we went over to Eric’s and hung out with Michael, Shawn, Rex, and some of Eric’s friends. Saturday we were going to take Heather’s car to the dealership to get checked out, but we got some really awful news. Heather’s mother’s boyfriend of 8 years, Bruce Jones, died that morning. It was so sad, the three of us went to Riverside to help out her mom and make sure she got something to eat. I am really heartbroken for her mother. After helping her as much as we could, Heather, Michael, and I decided to go thrift store hunting and had a blast finding cheap treasures. We drove all over Birmingham and then had dinner at our favorite restaurant, PF Changs . Heather, Michael, and Eric wanted to go to Atrox (supposedly the scariest haunted house in Alabama), but by the time we got back to Pell City it was too late. I was really relieved because I hate haunted houses and thought I might cry if they forced me to go…I am such a scaredy cat. We ended up coming back to my apartment and making pumpkin muffins and watching Land of the Lost. It was a HUGE disappointment and possibly the worst movie I’ve ever seen. Sunday we took Heather and Michael’s five babies to Paws in the Park at the Pell City Civic Center Park. They looked so adorable and had a fabulous time. The weather was perfect and all the dogs were so well behaved. I really had an awesome time! After that we went grocery shopping (our least favorite thing to do because it sucks our will to live) and made a delicious Mexican fiesta for dinner. We made homemade steak flautas (for Eric and Michael) and chile relleno burritos for myself and Heather. It was great; we roasted our own chilies in the oven and they were so tender and delicious…I just wish they would have been spicier!!! 9 more school days until fall break and I can’t wait.

Heather and I at the Homecoming game.
I am freezing!

Katie and Harley

Heather, Britney, Keela, and Meg

Heather secretly yearns to be a cheerleader

Megaphones are awesome

Megaphone head Heather

The cheerleaders and the mascot

Cheering with the little girls

Some girls from the crowd get to cheer

Heather feeds Kira popcorn while Eric isn't looking

Heather

Michael and Heather

Kira eyes the popcorn with starvation and longing in her eyes

Heather and I on our downtown adventure

Sloss Furnace

Downtown Birmingham

Heather

Driving around Birmingham

Heather and Michael in the truck

Michael tries on glasses in Hot Topic

Getting a scalp massage at Brookstone

Michael forces me to try it even though I don't love lice like he does

Hopefully my cap will protect me from germs...people are GROSS!!!

Winkie and Chloe in their crocheted vests

The girls are ready for Paws in the Park

Molly and Emily look adorable in their matching dresses

They are so excited to be in the car

Michael walks Chloe and Winkie

Me with the twins

A clown with a mini-clown horse

The puppies and I pose with the clown lady

They love riding horses

Heather and I with the Chihuahuas

A cat on a leash

I take the twins on a swing

Heather and Michael with all the puppies

Michael, Emily, Molly, and Winkie

Heather pushes Chloe in the swing

Chloe

Molly and I

Michael pushes Chloe

Heather, Michael, and the babies

Heather pushes Winkie

Heather and Michael watch Winkie in the swing

Michael pushes Winkie

Michael, Emily, Molly, and I

Emily and I

Winkie loves to swing

I swing with the twins

Molly and Emily

Chloe and Winkie

Molly chases Heather

Michael and his baby, Daisy

Heather and Molly

Chloe and I

Chloe meets a Husky and a prince

Heather and Chloe befriend another pug

Winkie makes a friend

Heather and I with the babies

Heather and Daisy meet another Chihuahua

A dog in a hot dog costume...So cute!

Heather and I get ready to leave with the puppies

Heather and I wait with the dogs while Michael checks out the car show.

Our homemade chile rellenos

Heather makes flautas

Making Spanish Rice

Our Mexican feast.

I am AWESOME!!!

Today I had my most embarrassing moment and of course, being as awesome as I am, it had to occur in front of every single one of my students, Lincoln High School parents, the police, and my bosses. It all started at the homecoming parade. I took a group of girls to Waffle House (where the parade was scheduled to start) and was about to drive back to the bonfire sight so that we would have a car to get back home with. Heather and I were talking and I got distracted and missed the turn. Rather than turn around and go back I thought it would be a great idea to just drive over the grass. BIG MISTAKE!!! Little did I know that the nice little curve of grass turned into a death-defying 3 foot drop. By the time I realized this it was too late, I tried to brake, but of course the grass was wet and my car slid into the abyss, nearly flipping over. It was soooo mortifying because it happened just as the parade started and I had to wait until it was over to get my car towed out of the mud pit. To make matters worse, this idiot kid decided it would be funny to stand in the street and tell everyone that it was my car, including my principal and department head. My students were laughing so hard I thought their sides would burst, some even pulled out their phones and took pictures. GREAT!!! I now have to move out of state and find a new job where no one knows what a complete and total moron I am.

Looking mortified as the parade goes by
Thankfully we didn't tip or sink into the mud hole

The cheerleaders stop what they are doing to laugh...they are definitely running laps tomorrow :)

I'm awesome

Heather and I waiting for our knight in shining armor to pull us out.